Deze expat houdt Nederland een spiegel voor en fraai is dat niet

twitter, Nederland, doeslief

28 november, 2019
Door: Steffi Posthumus

5 minuten lezen

Geboren en getogen Nederlanders hebben het vaak niet door, maar we komen soms nogal bot over. ‘Direct’ noemen we dat dan. Maar niet iedereen ziet dat zo. De Britse expat Ben Coats – die schrijft over de Nederlanders en de Nederlandse cultuur, houdt Nederland een spiegel voor.

1. Een beetje spannend vindt hij het wel.

Am I brave/stupid/boring enough to do a little thread about how Dutch people treat expats like me? Yeah, I think maybe I am.

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

2. Over het algemeen vindt hij het hartstikke fijn om in Nederland te wonen.

For someone born elsewhere, living in the Netherlands is a delight. The weather’s terrible, but the people are fun and friendly, the cities beautiful and the public services exceptional.

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

3. Maar er is ook een mindere kant.

But…the attitude some people have towards foreigners/immigrants/expats is disgraceful – and seems to be getting worse

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

4. Die volgens Ben door Nederlanders vaak wordt verklaard met ‘We zijn gewoon direct’.

A lighthearted observation about (for example) Dutch love of coffee, or hatred of bike helmets, generates reams of unpleasantry. Dutch “directness” is often just an excuse for unkindness.

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

5. En dan heeft hij het nog relatief makkelijk.

As an educated white guy I know I don’t have much to complain about, compared to (say) a Muslim immigrant who cleans houses for a living. But my inbox these days often overflows with abuse.

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

6. On- en offline, links en rechts: Ben ziet de botheid overal terugkomen.

It’s worse on social media, of course, but also happens in real life, more than you’d think. The rule often seems to be: “you’re free to hold any view and voice any opinion – unless you do it in a foreign accent”

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

And it’s not just far-right types. A surprising number of people are proudly pro-equality, anti-PVV, #FBPE etc – but also think house prices are too high because of tyfus foreigners who should f*** off back where they came from

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

7. En wat valt er nou eigenlijk te mopperen?

Yes, some Brits and Americans here drink too much, only speak English and never leave Amsterdam. But many don’t. The Netherlands is not full, actually. Your economy’s good. Crime rates are falling. Your country is not being taken over by anyone. Your culture’s very much alive.

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

And those foreigners a surprising number of you rail against? They work for your companies. They teach your kids. They pick your sprouts and fix your cars and design your websites and build your houses. They pay taxes.

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

They’ve been further than the Randstad. They have Dutch husbands and wives and boyfriends and girlfriends. They raise Dutch kids. They speak your language.
They know your history. One day, they might even become Dutch. They embody the Dutch dream.

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

8. Dus dat.

By all means, disagree and complain if you want to. But please, don’t claim to cherish and defend liberal values while doing your best to undermine them. Don’t judge. Don’t hate. Be kind. pic.twitter.com/i2q76B9oSi

— Ben Coates (@bencoates1) November 27, 2019

9. Veel expats herkennen zich in de tweets.

Ah yes, good old “je moet kunnen zeggen wat je vindt” but there’s too much focus on “moet” and not enough on “kunnen”. Being able to speak your mind does not equal being obliged to actually do so. Be kind sometimes doesn’t enter the equation. 🙁

— Ailsa Leadbetter (@aylatwork) November 27, 2019

As a French woman married to a Dutch man, I couldn’t agree more. Some people even told my husband, in front of me, that there are too many people coming to live in the Netherlands… 1/2

— Mw aux PB (@AuxPB) November 27, 2019

And many MANY Dutch people (not all though!) make fun of my accent when I speak Dutch and are then offended when I switch back to English. Some even correct the way I pronounce the name of my daughter 😑 But well, not all Dutch people, it’s still a great country! 😉 2/2

— Mw aux PB (@AuxPB) November 27, 2019

pic.twitter.com/Qcma1do9A8

— Betty Feenstra (@bettyfeenstra) November 27, 2019

10. Al zijn er ook een paar die het gezeur vinden.

Hmm sorry to hear you are harassed, I would suggest going to the police if it is serious.

I also apologise for presuming you’d be curious about Dutch history and social practices rather than just wanting a moan – ‘kankeren’ in Dutch – about your travails.

Have a fantastic day

— Julius Waller (@JuliusWaller) November 28, 2019

When you’re a foreigner and criticize another culture you should not be surprised being criticized yourself. It’s a normal defense mechanism in every culture. So don’t whine or complane.

— Ryan Auster (@AusterRyan) November 27, 2019

11. Toch zijn er een stuk meer Nederlanders die zich er wél in herkennen.

Thank you for this Ben, I totally feel you. I used to be quite ignorant on this, but since I moved abroad and started visiting the Netherlands with my non-Dutch girlfriend-now-wife, the attitude some have towards her can be very annoying and often I don’t know how to deal with it https://t.co/i5GT1W4lOn

— Eduard Cousin (@EduardCousin) November 27, 2019

As a proud Dutchy but, after 28 years abroad looking from the outside in, I’m afraid I agree. The Dutch are not as liberal as they claim to be, nor are they open-minded or laid-back. However, in their/our defence, it seems the World has hardened up and so did the Dutch. 1/

— Laura Spoelstra 🇳🇱🇬🇧 (@Laura_Spoelstra) November 27, 2019

Hit the nail on the head! As a born and raised Dutchman I have to humbly admit we are only as liberal, open and progressive as we claim when it suits us. Populism sadly has taken way more hold of our society than it should

— Racing 🍊 (@OnnoKonemann) November 27, 2019