Je komt leuke mensen tegen op Tinder, maar ook vreemde mensen. Deze Amerikaanse man heeft misschien wel de gekste Tinder-ervaring ooit.
1. Ga er maar voor zitten:
2. Het begint goed. Wel een dubieus account.
So a few weeks ago I was on the Tinder machine shopping my soul around and I match with a very attractive young lady. No bio. Fairly innocuous.
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
3. Het lijkt de goede kant op te gaan.
I message her some random shit and we chat for an hour or so and she says “here’s my number text me” I’m like okay sure thing.
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
4. Maar dan neemt ze plotseling afscheid.
I text her n we make small talk abt work for a bit then she goes, “actually, I have this huge presentation Im workin on for my job, would you be offended if I got back to you in like a week or two when Ive got more free time? Youre cute and I want to meet you Im just too busy rn”
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I thought well that’s an overly elaborate way to ghost someone. I say “lol I wouldn’t be offended, I totally get it. Hit me up when you’re free”
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
5. Op dat moment denkt hij: ‘Het zal wel’
She says “thank you, I was worried you would think I was trying to blow you off haha but for sure I’ll text you in like a week, I’m excited” in my head I’m like sssssssuuuuurrrreeee I respond “😊”
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
6. Er verstrijken twee weken.
Two weeks pass I completely forget about her then I remember and go back to tinder and I can’t find the conversation. 🧐 I think well that’s weird she deleted her tinder but I take it as… overly elaborate ghosting methods
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
7. Maar dan krijgt hij een sms…
Then yesterday I get a text “HEY IM FINALLY FREE LMAO… my friend is DJing near Union square around 6 tomorrow I was wondering if you wanted to go for a bit then we could go get drinks after and see what happens”
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I’m like well I’ll be damned. Genuinely didn’t think she would message me. I reply “yeah I should be free, I’d be down” she says “amazing I’m gonna be running around today and tomorrow but just come around 6 and I’ll meet you by the stage then we’ll head out”
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
8. De date gaat door!
I say sure thing, looking forward to it. This morning she texts me at 9 am “hey it’s gonna rain today but I think it should clear up in time for our date” I’m like cool, I’ll be there
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
9. Toch blijft hij het een vreemd verhaal vinden.
I play football with @mersrulesworld_ earlier today and express my incredulity at the situation. I find her Instagram it says singer, actress, model, 3000 followers and I’m like uugghhhh I dunno bro, THIS SHIT FEELS OFF but fuck it
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
10. Maar hij gaat toch maar op stap.
I make my way to Union Square. Eat a hot dog and look over by this open lot by 17th Ave and there is a stage and a DJ and about 100 ppl and cameras and shit and I think well this is some random ass Manhattan shit.
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
She texts me “hey I’m running a little late but just meet me by the stage then we can go” I wasn’t gonna stand in front of the fucking stage so I stand off to the side a bit
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
11. En dan neemt het verhaal een wending.
Eventually I see a girl moving towards backstage with two enormous bodyguards in sunglasses and realise it’s her and I’m thinking WHAT THINE FUCKETH IS GOING ON
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I stay back and assess the situation and I’m like fuck I’mma stay right where I am til she texts me. The DJ eventually stops playing and she gets on the stage and I’m so fucking confused but think well I guess she’s a social media personality or some shit
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
12. Hij is er in ieder geval klaar mee. Maar blijft kijken.
I immediately think I’m too fucking old for this shit.
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
13. Dan komt de aap uit de mouw.
She gets the mic and is like thanks for coming out I bet you’re all wondering what this is about and I’m like yeah what the fuck is this about
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
She then says so I know all of you here are on tinder and I’m like 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
14. Wat?!
Then she says I’ve invited you all here for a chance to go on a date with me and proceeds to give a hunger games speech about what its gonna take to date her
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
15. Alle aanwezige mannen zijn gekomen op haar uitnodiging…
ALL THE DUDES THERE SHE FOUND ON TINDER AND TEXTED THEM THE SAME SHIT
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
Every man in the crowd looks down and mimes WHAT IN THE NAME OF SCOOBY DOO THE IS THIS SHIT to themself
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
16. We snappen zijn verbazing wel.
At that point I am genuinely amazed at the fallopian fortitude this girl possesses. This is top 10 greatest finesse of all time. Dudes actually stayed and played.
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
17. Moraal van het verhaal”
I went home.
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I TRUST NO ONE. I TRUST NOTHING ANYMORE. VANITY WILL BE THE DEMISE OF HUMAN CIVILIZATION. DON’T GET GOT. THE END.
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
18. En zo zag dat eruit:
The scene pic.twitter.com/U0ROAWKDQc
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
19. En ook andere ‘slachtoffers’ reageren op het verhaal.
Braaa I was victim #205 😭😭😭😂 Kinda glad I was running on cp time pic.twitter.com/agBFXje8dD
— MRG (@MRGwingteam) August 20, 2018
20. Wat een verhaal! Uiteindelijk heeft zelfs de New York Times erover schrijft.
I like how the image here is just a wall of bananas https://t.co/7qrNYYnMeY
— JessicaMae Stover ✘ (@JSto) August 21, 2018
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